You get an idea. You get excited. Pumped. Motivated.

You take action once.

Maybe a few times.

Then your motivation fizzles out.

A universal example of this is that so many people believe that weight loss or fitness is just about going on a diet for a period of time and overworking themselves at the gym, trying to get to their goal as quickly as possible.

But it’s not really just about making temporary changes.

It’s about acting as if you’re already the person who has lost the weight.

And to keep it off? You keep acting as if you’re the person who has lost the weight.

It’s about shifting how you identify with the choices you make around food, body movement, sleep, and even alcohol so that you become that fit, healthy, active person.

Temporary actions don’t create a permanent identity.

And if you struggle to see yourself as actually being that person who lives that kind of lifestyle as a way of existing in the world (not just until you lose the weight), you’re going to burn yourself out quickly and never want to step foot in a gym again.

Or you’ll lose the weight, reach your goal, and then put it all back on – ever watch that documentary on the contestants of The Biggest Loser?

Motivation is nice. It’s what gets you into action.

But motivation fades.

Identity sticks.

And whether it’s weight loss or stock trading or just making a change about something in yourself, you must assume your new identity. You must choose to be the new person.

When you make that shift, motivation becomes irrelevant. You simply do what you do, because that’s who you are.

“What’s wrong with me?”

If you keep asking the same old question, your mind will give you the same answer, from the same perspective of the old version of you.

And believe it or not, your mind is working exactly as it’s supposed to. It’s called confirmation bias, and your brain is built to confirm what it thinks it already knows. (More on this in Sign #5…)

Ever find yourself saying something like the following phrases to yourself?

“I can’t believe I did that again.”
“I always f*ck things up.”
“I never stick to the plan.”
“I should really be further along by now.”
“I need to make myself do the thing.”

Just try on one of those phrases right now and notice how much inner resistance you feel inside to actually take action towards change.

These kinds of phrases don’t actually motivate you in a sustainable way.

They just create shame.

And shame keeps you stuck in a loop.

So, you have my permission to delete “can’t,” “always,” “never,” “should,” and “need to” from your vocabulary.

But if it were really about tediously, consciously changing your self-talk around the challenges you face, you probably would have become your own best friend by now.

But letting your “future you” identity take the wheel?

Well, if you were to have already created the change you want in yourself, how would that change your inner monologue? Notice what changes when you consider your own inner self-talk from the perspective of your future self.

And how you identify doesn’t just show up in your internal self-talk. It rules the level you set for your ambitions too…

Since I was first introduced to the markets when I was sixteen years old in economics class, I knew I wanted to become a stock trader.

But I didn’t get into it right away.

In fact, I avoided it.

I didn’t want to feel the pain of not “being enough” to really get a sense of myself donning this identity I wanted to become.

I met other traders over the years.

An engineer who created his own commodities algorithm and became a millionaire and bought himself a lovely hilltop home overlooking Austin, Texas…

A musician my age living in L.A., who created a comfortable life for himself that offered him freedom to choose how to spend his time…

And although the conversations were lively and invigorating and exciting…

And even though I always felt the tug, the calling…

I used to tell myself I didn’t have the money to lose or the skill.

And both statements were 100% true.

But the deeper truth was that I didn’t give myself permission to take imperfect action to close the gap between where I was and where I wanted to be, because I couldn’t stand the pain of being wrong.

So, when I first finally started trading in the stock market, I came at it with a lot of fear.

"What if I’m fooling myself?"

Have you ever noticed how, when you really want something but don’t believe you can have it, you tend to sabotage yourself from success?

I identify as a financially cautious person, so I never “blew up an account” like so many beginner traders do. But I did find myself making decisions that hamstringed my success.

It wasn’t until I worked on my identity as a stock trader and built that trust in myself that I started to dial in my skill and skyrocket my growth.

And maybe for you it’s starting that business. Or going back to school for that thing you’re actually passionate about. Or creating the kind of relationship that would feel fulfilling and satisfying for you in the long term.

It’s the same for you, whatever your big dreams and goals are. When you work on changing how you feel about how you identify yourself, that’s when your whole trajectory shifts forever.